“It is better to conquer yourself than to win a thousand battles. Then the victory is yours. It cannot be taken from you, not by angels or by demons, heaven, or hell.”
– DHAMMAPADA
Given the continual tensions in your life, it is challenging to maintain peace and a positive attitude. When you work, very hard continuously without giving yourself quality time to breathe deeply and unplug, you become emotionally stressed, and this way you can’t escape the negativity.
Your life can be out of balance and the scene of it down the road to see where you are heading evolves into fogs. Carrying on this way can be dangerous as negativity creates resentment, depression, more fear and deeply rooted anger. Things go out of control
All Starts with a Decision
Being decisive on switching your mode and energy takes some gut. It means you will have to do some work by starting small. You will have to do some changes and take some steps. Do not underestimate the little things that when you do, would create little changes. Small change is a step to transformation.
I am not a Pollyanna
The notion of thinking positively is misunderstood by many, as it sounds fluffy. This notion is a problem for many people who believe that the world won’t change by good thinking and thus reject the whole idea.
Your Brain
Negative thinking is a habit. It is something you can re-arrange your brain to work on. Our brain is a powerhouse organ that many of us misuse and abuse. Taking care of it by doing the right things, will lead you to health, wealth, happiness, and surely positivity.
Why we have Negative Emotions?
Negative emotions like anger, resentment or fear are there to help us with survival. They helps us to take action and protect ourselves from threats. They are there to help us be alert and alive. He thing is that they are designed for survival. If there is a hungry wolf showing his teeth in front of you, you surely won’t ignore it and do whatever you are doing. You will do your best either run or protect yourself.
Negativity in the Modern World
Being negative doesn’t help nowadays. Imagine you have a lot of work to do , and you feel worried you won’t get things done, can you guess what happens at this situation? You brain will get locked into only this specific thing and ignores the coming signals for better alternatives.
What Should I do when I experience negative stuff? Should I force myself to feel positive?
Allow whatever happens to be and then let go. You can’t stop life from happening. You can’t pretend that occurrences of misfortune. Let the negative stuff happen, watch, and observe. Take whatever happens all, let it be, let it consume you, feel the pain. It’s life! Then, get out of that (It isn’t easy) but do it, my friend, get out of it, pretend you are an outsider, you are playing a game.
Positivity and Science
Research showed that positive thinking has a scientific basis. We cannot change circumstances in the world, however, we can change how we see and react to them. This attitude can change the way that we feel about surroundings and us which can have a massive positive impact on your well-being.
Thoughts of lack and disturbance
There is no truth in lack or limitation. Fear, doubt, anxiety, anger, resentment pull down the cells of the body, shock the nervous system, and are the causes of disease and disaster. Negative emotions create negative realities. They create a negative vortex field, which within a buffer of time is programmed to keep spinning by the negative inputs.
Types of People
There are two types of people. Those who spend all their time thinking about their limitations and lack, and those who can be painfully aware of their issues but instead choose to focus on what they have. The second group of people gets blissful experience in their life.
Is it that hard to understand?
The first type spends most of their energy thinking about how to fix their issues. The second type shifts their focus into developing their existing gifts. Which type would you want to be within life? Which type would you rely on?
Your point of Focus (Negative Focus)
When you dwell on negative thoughts, you rewire your brain to sabotage your sincere efforts. It is not surprising that we tend to fixate on what we don’t have. We live in a world that continuously bombarding us with commercial messages telling us that we are not smart, beautiful, or successful enough. We unconsciously focus more on what we lack, what we fear, or what we try to avoid than on what we have.
You are the Author
They say “This shall pass!” over and over. Now here many of us begin creating scenarios of disasters about your luck in life and other people. Remember that this is your life and you are the scriptwriter. You are the author of your life.
Inner Monkey
Our reactions to things in life are determined by what we say or think on the inside. It is the self-talk going on inside our heads. When our self-talk says negative stuff to us, we react to circumstances in a negative way. We have to spot our self-talking inner monkey, we have to recognize it and do the necessary changes by talking to it.
How to change the self-talk?
One of the fastest ways that worked for me is to reframe the conversation going on. Let’s say you experienced something bad when you reframe, you see that thing is happening for a reason that will teach you something which will make you act in a certain way. There is always a different approach of looking at matters in life. You will just need to do some practice. You need to learn and enjoy reframing it is FUN. 🙂
An example of reframing: Oh, look the weather is gloomy today! ‘There is no such thing as bad weather only bad clothing, so sit back and enjoy a cup of hot chocolate!’
Taking Responsibility
If you want to develop a positive attitude in life for you, it means you have decided to take responsibility for your life. It means you are aiming to grow a mature personality. That’s great news because you want to conquer yourself. Historians say: ”Alexander conquered the whole world except…Alexander.” Alexander the Great died at the age of 32 years. Some historians his death happened due to drinking too much alcohol.
Where should I start?
Knowing what makes you feel negative is an important step to being positive. Spot and jot down all the little things that make you feel down. This step is powerful is you begin to see what things shift your mode down.
What can I do with what makes me feel down?
There are many ways to create a shift in your mode. You can write the feeling down, then reframe it by writing the opposite feeling you wish to have. Then, burn the unwanted feeling in a safe place.
You can write an affirmation of the wanted feeling and carry the affirmation with you everywhere, glancing at it frequently or type it down on your phone and set an alarm to remind you repeating your new wanted positive feeling. This is called rewiring or conscious programming.
Meditation
People who meditate daily show more positive thinking and attitude than those who do not. People who meditate show more mindfulness, ability to fully experience the moment.
Affirmations
Neuroscience has proven that your brain is a goal-pursuing organ. Any recurring image, idea, or outcome you hold in your awareness, any outcome you talk about and feel strongly about, you will bring about. Affirmations are statements that suggest new thoughts and that by regularly using them, your brain will do whatever it has to resolve and create a better and more desirable outcome for you!
You can write down, hang them on your mirror or board, you can record and listen to them and of course say them aloud to yourself. I want you to take some brief breaths and begin saying them aloud.
I learnt about affirmations during my early twenties, I used to say them out load during my walk to the subway or the bus station. People looked at me but I didn’t care. I kept saying them. I wanted my life to be in better shape who cares!
The 18/40/60 Rule
When you’re 18, you worry about what everyone is thinking about you; when you’re 40 you don’t give a darn what anybody thinks of you; when you’re 60, you realize that nobody is thinking about you at all.
Dr. Daniel Amen
Have your affirmations stated clearly in the present tense. There are many examples on the web but I recommend you to write your own as they talk to your inner being. Simply ask yourself what problem I need to resolve? What urgent issue do I need to change?
Some of my favourite affirmations:
“I only speak positively about those in my world. Negativity has no part in my life.”
“I now release all expectations, and I know that I am taken care of.”
“I act with honor and integrity in all that I do.”
“I am becoming stronger every day.” “I am comfortable around all kinds of people.”
“You weren’t an accident. You weren’t mass-produced. You aren’t an assembly-line product. You were deliberately planned, specifically gifted, and lovingly positioned on the Earth by the Master Craftsman.
MAX LUCADO
I hope you enjoyed reading this post. I hope it helps you in your journey of life. I look forward to hearing your comments, experiences, and suggestions.
Love & Gratitude
